Methods of Breathing
by Oceanmegami
Summary: Collection of drabbles and fic-lets inspired by the songs of the band Chicosci. May or may not be interrelated with one another. Various pairings; yaoi, yuri, het. Mainly KxZ.
1. Table of Contents

**.: Methods of Breathing :.**

This is a collection of drabbles and fic-lets inspired by songs of the band Chicosci. These include various pairings, which range from yaoi, yuri, to hetero, and most of the stories are mainly (if not all of them) angsty, so be warned. These are entirely different from my fluffy stories, since, well, Chicosci's songs aren't exactly _happy_ ones (depressing, vampiric songs, to be more precise. Well, most of them anyway. The tune's sometimes happy/energetic-sounding, but if you read the lyrics, they're the opposite ^^;; Well, it actually depends on the person. I find them fun, actually. *lol* XD). And oh, almost forgot; the title "Methods of Breathing" is taken from that of the band's second album. ^^

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**.: Disclaimer :.**

I do not own the marvelous work that is Vampire Knight. It belongs to its creator, Hino Matsuri-sama.

As for the songs that are going to be used in this collection, they belong to the band Chicosci. (I couldn't even do screamo songs like the vocalist Miggy does, so hah. XD)

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**.: Table of Contents :.**

+ +A Promise (Ichiru x Zero)

+ + The Devil Made Me Do It (Kaname x Zero, Kaname x Yuuki)

++ Sweet Maria (Zero x Yuuki)

++ You're Killing Me (Kaname x Zero)

++ January Days (Yori x Yuuki)

++ Seven Black Roses (Kaname x Zero)

++ Pink Hearts, Yellow Stars (no pairing; Sarah-centric)

++ Knives (Ichiru x Shizuka)

++Last Look (Kaname x Yuuki, Zero x Yuuki)

++ Lavender Marriage (Kaname x Zero, Riido x Shizuka)

++ When Flight is Denied (no true pairing; Zero-centric)

++ In Response: A Senseless Act of Beauty (Kaname x Zero)

++ Shallow Graves (Haruka x Juuri)

++ In Arms (Kaito x Zero)

++ Theme from Conversations with Fire (Yori x Yuuki)

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**.: Updates/Progress :.**

**[ 02/08/10 ] :** As of now, none of the drabbles have been uploaded yet; the first one, "A Promise" is currently in progress. And to those wondering about my other stories (Playing Matchmaker, Halfhearted Vengeance, Between Day and Night, Zero says MEOW, Gemini, Reaching for the Sky), as I've said before, their updates got erased (my pc had to be reformatted and I did not have any back-up files other than in the hard drive of said pc). I'm trying my best to re-write them, but my muses are very fickle. School, too, is pretty hectic, so please _do not_ expect me to update immediately or frequently. Updates will be random, but hopefully they'll return back to normal when summer break comes (half-way of March through May).

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	2. I: A Promise

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**.: A Promise :.**

_Now you are my beloved ghost  
__And here I'll wait for you to sing  
__And we will have eternity  
__A promise to keep haunting me_

_The sky is ours to keep tonight  
__Together in this silent sleep  
__We are the mist that fills the air  
__Lie still, just be with me_

_I'm not alone, I can feel your eyes on me  
__I'm not alone, your soul for all the world to see.  
__Denied another day, life took you away.  
__I'll love you just the same._

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**I.**

Coldness…that is all he feels.

Mother. Father. Brother. Humanity.

All of these he had lost…all in but a single, dreadful night.

And along with it, so did the once smiling boy had vanished.

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**II.**

Emotions…just what exactly are emotions?

Happiness. Loneliness. Joy. Sorrow.

These are but foreign words to him; words that he cannot comprehend.

Perhaps if it were him from the past, he would have.

But now…now there's nothing left but a void. He felt…empty.

Although hatred—yes, _hatred_!—that he can understand.

Oh, yes, that is a feeling he knew too well.

That sweet burning inside that longs for vengeance.

He tells himself—convinces himself, even—that it's the only thing he needs…

That it is only thing that keeps him alive and makes him continue forward.

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**III.**

With a hardened resolve and an armor of hatred, he deems himself invincible.

With this, he thinks, nothing could harm him—let alone touch him—anymore.

Bereft of all the warmth he once had, he instead embraced the coldness.

He let himself be immersed in it; become one with it.

What a soothing presence it was to him.

It neither loves him nor does it despise him; that he knows fully well.

But at least…at least it would not leave him like the warmth had.

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**IV.**

And yet...when the time had come for them to meet again…

Why is it that he could not bring forth the burning hatred he had nursed for so long?

He then realized all of a sudden…

That his armor, which was tampered into invincibility with his resentment…

Was actually full of holes he had failed to notice before.

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**V.**

He sees an opening; immediately, he raises his gun and points it at him.

His finger rests tremblingly at the trigger…and he hesitates.

And that was all the other had needed to move closer to him.

A silver katana flashes in front of his eyes.

Almost belatedly, he raises his arm and blocks it with his gun.

But it was too late to have dodged the attack fully.

A long, red gash stretched across his forearm; the once white sleeve now dyed red.

Then almost unconsciously he wonders…

Which hurt more: the wound on his arm, or the one in his _heart_…?

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**VI.**

Was it wrong for him to betray his brother?

That was a thought that kept on repeating in his mind over and over as they fought.

His body was physically in combat, just as his thoughts waged war inside of him.

He loved her—he really _does_—that why he chose to do so, but…

Aren't his feelings just an illusion; a mere misconception of the truth?

If so, does that explain why his chest burns so with each thrust of his sword…?

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**VII.**

And then demise had fallen upon her.

But had it really mattered to him? The answer is no.

Rage, yes, and anger had made its way to his veins like molten lead;

For a few moments he had actually thought of putting all the blame on him.

He willed himself to burn the image of her corpse into his consciousness…

But he failed.

Because all that he sees—even in his mind's eye—is an image of _him_:

A mirror image of himself staring back at him from within that cold, dark cellar.

And that's when he made up his mind.

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**VIII.**

He offers himself to his other half…

But was met with the defiance he had known he possessed.

He moves closer to him.

He wraps his arms around him.

And then he whispers to his ear, softly…

It wasn't a request, but rather, a command.

Yes, he wants him to live—for both of them.

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**IX.**

For the first time in a long while, he cried.

He allowed the tears to fall from his silver-amethyst eyes without restraint.

He cried for himself—for his own weakness; for all the pent-up sorrow that had built up upon years…

And most importantly, he cried for his brother—for his _beloved_.

He reaches a hand towards a pale cheek; it was cold to his touch.

This was nothing like the cold he had been used to; it is that of death's itself.

Soon, desperation came knocking at his door, telling him to follow suit.

But that…that is something he cannot do—to join him in death's embrace…

Instead, he held the limp body even closer to his own, and closed his eyes.

At least, even for a little while, he wants for them to stay like this.

So that he can convince himself, no matter how brief or disillusioned it may be…

That the two of them are together again, at long last.

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**X.**

"_Close your eyes, Zero…and pretend that I am here._

_When reality becomes too much for you to bear, let your dreams be your safe haven;_

_There, I forever await you with open arms…"_

A mellow voice whispered as invisible, ghostly arms wrapped around the young man.

Zero shivers as he seemingly feels a presence surround him.

Then he smiles. A faint, lingering one, but a smile nonetheless.

The future may look glum, but he felt at peace; serene, even.

Because he knew—he knows—that he is not alone.

He'll keep on living, as Ichiru had told him to…

Until the day comes that they may be reunited again, for eternity.

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A/N: I hope it's not too bad (although the end must be pretty cheesy. heh. But I've been trying to make it canon-ish so yeah...XD;;). Please tell me what you think. I haven't written in this style for a long while, so it'd be great to hear what you think. ;)


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